 |
||||||||||||||
   
Balancing Act: The Newsletter (No. 215, July 2017) Balancing Act® is our registered trademark. You are encouraged to share the contents with others with appropriate attribution. Please use the ® whenever the phrase "Balancing Act" is used in connection with this newsletter or our workshops. Balancing act is in four sections this month: 1. Techniques for Balance 2. Musings 3. The Human Condition: Dysphemism 4. ORTIYKMWOYBNT-O Department FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER! YOU CAN FIND ME HERE: AND FIND ME ON FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/RockStarOfConsulting Free consulting newsletter: The Million Dollar Consulting® Mindset: Listen to my new, free Podcast Series on iTunes or on ContrarianConsulting.com: The Uncomfortable Truth 
• Before you begin lecturing someone else or ending friendships ask, "Is this better handled with condemnation or through compassion?" • Listen to your kids (and young people). You may be right that they're immature, but they may be right that you're wrong about something. • If you want to learn, listen. It's tough to learn anything while you're talking. (That's why so many college professors are so arrogant.) • If you want to see industry disruption at work, consider movies giving way to cable, and cable giving way to Apple and Netflix. • Comparing this country to what they do in Denmark is like comparing what a university does compared to a pre-school. • Telling doctors to merely wash their hands has prevented countless iatrogenic illnesses. Are you telling your employees or colleagues the same thing—to make sure they're not causing the problems they're paid to solve? • If you want to see what a poorly run, bureaucratic, customer-unfriendly operation looks like in real life, visit any medical office or practice. • People purchase aspirations more than they purchase products, especially at the high end. You don't need a Breitling to tell the time, but you do need other people to know you use a Breitling to tell the time. Are you creating that sensation with your own products and services? • Stage actors are always so much more poised than movie and TV actors. You don't get "second takes" in real life. • Don't argue irrationality. If people believe there are conspiracies all around them, that's paranoia, which is an illness, not something you can train or coach people "out of." 
When does the estimable "passion" transmogrify into the shunned "zealotry"? When does influence become manipulation, and persuasion become Machiavellian? I had a political science professor at Rutgers who told us that "War is simply the least subtle form of communication." His example fascinated me, because I began to think in terms of continua. For example, "assertiveness" is neither good nor bad, it's simply a behavior, and within a reasonable range can be effective whether high or low, as appropriate. I want sales people who are assertive. But I want counselors who are low in assertiveness, so that they are approachable and non-threatening. On the aberrant low end of assertiveness—figure two standard deviations if you're into standard deviations—would be a coma. And on the equivalent high end would be belligerency. Thus, when we talk of "assertiveness" it should be without emotional baggage or predisposed judgment. Its application and utility vary depending on the circumstances and the goals. The same is true of love and hate. They are both deep passions, often thinly separated by respect, tolerance, and forgiveness. But I'm convinced this is the cause of marriages—richer or poorer, sickness and health, till death do us part—ending in bitter, horrible, war-strewn debris of enmity and revenge. This is also the case of business partnerships, stable and productive for years and suddenly rent apart like tissue paper and dissolved in lawsuits and slander when the partners turn respect into retribution. (I counsel people not to form legal partnerships because they are worse than divorces if they fall apart, which many do.) Back to my original inquiry: I think passionate people seek to influence and persuade. But zealots insist on conversion. A passionate person will give it his or her best shot, but respect you if you decide to demur. However, zealots insist that not only are they right but you must be wrong. You can only be "cleansed" by becoming one of them. (When you talk to people about climate change, or immigration, or abortion, or—unfortunately today—politics, you can see this phenomenon all too readily.) "Zeal" means "great enthusiasm." But "zealotry" is about fanaticism and intolerance. I love being around passionate, enthusiastic people, whether I agree with them or not. But I eschew zealots, even if they do agree with me. 
I want to thank my colleague Bruce Turkel (author of the excellent book, It's All About Them) for bringing this wonderful term to my attention. DIS-fa-mizem is the term for the substitution of a derogatory word or phrase for a neutral one, viz.: "loony bin" for "mental hospital." (I like to think of "Congress" being used in place of "esteemed edifice in which respectful debate occurs," but that's me.) If you oppose some of the thinking about climate change you become a "denier." A woman with high standards and demanding work expectations becomes a "bitch." A mature person who recalls times when things worked better (refer to Congress, above) is "an old fogey." An IT professional is a "geek" or a "nerd." A cross-breed dog is a "mutt" (the logic behind that dysphemism makes my kids "mutts"). Personal injury lawyers become "ambulance chasers." We need to stop labeling people because, as with all the horoscopic personality assessments I loathe (you're a blue, High D, JKLM, anal-retentive ironic, so there's no way you can do this job) because we use them to explain away people rather than trying to understand them. There is virtually no difference between these positions and the statements we all claim to despise: What do you expect from a woman? What do you expect from someone his age? What do you expect from someone with their background? What I expect is respect. Respect isn't generated by the labeling of personalities, careers, job titles, or behaviors. It's generated by understanding that we don't like to be called names or classified or dismissed out of hand. So we have a hell of a nerve doing that to others. It's all too easy to say "He's a punk kid," or "She's a bureaucrat," or "they're the one percent." And it's therefore too easy to miss the possible value that they provide in that circumstance. One of the reasons I'm so successful in life is that a whole lot of people have underestimated me by assigning me labels. They don't do that any more, because we're no longer in the same universe. 
I'm sitting on the couch watching TV, and I realize my iPad's battery has just given up the ghost. I have a charger, but the outlet is too far away for me to continue reading easily. I'm trying to stretch the cord, to see if I change my position I can charge it and still read, when I knock something over on the end table. When I pick it up, I realize it's the hard copy edition of the book I was reading. 
NEW: THE 2018 MILLION DOLLAR CONSULTING® CONVENTION April 18-20, 2018, Boston Featuring my special guest Chip Bell, general sessions by Suzanne Bates and Dorie Clark, 12 concurrent sessions, networking events, cocktail reception, and…me!! We already have nearly 100 people on board, join us for what participants call "the best event of its kind in the world": Sign up here: The 2018 Million Dollar Consulting® Convention My collected IP in text, video, audio, workshop, and electronic availability, about $75,000 worth from the past decade and more, is available for one payment for lifetime membership. This was formerly up to $4,500 annually, and is now $2,500 for lifetime access, and we are continually adding new IP. Go here: Lifetime Growth Access NEW: LIFESTORMING - THE TELECONFERENCE July 6, 2017, 11AM US Eastern time (1 hour) The audible version of the book isn't yet available, but this teleconference should take care of that for now. I'll discuss: - How to set intelligent aspirations - Triage among friends - Challenging your own belief system - The components and evolution of character - The concept of critical abandonment - How to grant yourself more permission - Growth through generosity Click here to register: Lifestorming - The Teleconference NEW: GPS - GENIUS POSITIONING SYSTEM September 17-18, 2017, New York City Join Mark Levy and me for a day or 1.5 days and emerge with messaging, positioning, and branding that will land you on your ideal buyers' radar screens. We'll talk about moving from a brand to your name and then establishing sub- brands. We'll support this with relevant, exciting IP creation. This will be an intense two days of brand-sculpting. Click here to register: GPS - Genius Positioning System September 8, 2017, October 19-20, 2017, Boston Here's an unusual opportunity. I'm holding an event in Boston for a full day on September 8 on my book Million Dollar Maverick. It is for the original mutli-volume purchasers, but you can participate for just $750! Also, on October 19-20, I'm conducting two days on general entrepreneurialism and business growth in New York for one of my special groups, but you can attend both these days for $1,400. Email me for details at [email protected].
I’ve run two free pilots to test the technology, and now we’re off and running in 2017. Watch a one-hour workshop, rich in content, and ask questions while in progress, no matter where you are in the world. They are also recorded, in case you can’t make the live event or want to retain the actual broadcast. I’m offering six, you can join any time and receive past episodes, as detailed below, at $75 each, or $400 for all six. You can register here: Livestream Workshops Schedule: • Feb. 23, 2017: The Strategist - How to set strategies for organizations or individuals (Completed but available on recording) • Apr. 18, 2017: The Innovator - A methodology for systematic innovation • Jun. 13, 2017: Creating 6-figure Projects - Consistently and effectively • Sep. 19, 2017: The Advisor - Advisory work as your primary intervention • Oct. 17, 2017: Abundance - The mindset of success, happiness, and growth • Nov. 16, 2017: The Expert - How to command a room, discussion, and direction FREE PODCASTS: THE UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH My new podcast series, twice monthly, on iTunes: #1: Control: How to maximize control of your life and not surrender your future. #2: Energy: How the Second Law of Thermodynamics can erode your business and your life if you don’t renew yourself. #3: Fear Not: Roosevelt was right, and we ought to stop being frightened by everything that goes “bump” in the night. #4: Marketing Magic: A manifesto on marketing—and buying—realities and why usage trumps functionality. #5: Myths: A memorial service to the many friends you lost when they went swimming 55 minutes after having lunch. #6: Polarization: The vast, ignorant error in believing people who disagree with you are stupid. #7: The Aggrieved: Why whatever you perceive your condition to be doesn’t warrant a vote in Congress or a newscast. #8: Conservatism: Why we are far too timid in our lives and work and how to stop playing a "prevent defense." #9: Degradation: How standards begin to erode and what we can do to correct it. #10: Overprotection: The cosseting of youth, and how it's leaving them vulnerable in the real world. #11: Overkill: Pounding away until the point is crushed under the weight of redundancy. #12: Denial: Why we make ostriches' behavior in the face of threat seem reasonable. #13: Selecting: We "settle" in stead of deliberately choosing what's best for us, and we need to stop that. #14: Contrarianism: Why taking an opposite view is a public service and how to do it. #15: Who Loves You?: Who's got your back and how you can tell, and why it's important. #16: No, You Can't: A different perspective on the popular—and incorrect—belief that you can do whatever you think you can.
Having problems viewing this email, click here. © Alan Weiss 2017 |
Balancing Act® is our registered trademark. You are encouraged to share the contents with others with appropriate attribution. Please use the ® whenever the phrase "Balancing Act" is used in connection with this newsletter or our workshops.
See Writing on the Wall, featuring Koufax the Wonder Dog.
Two new podcasts every week. Special cigar smoking room.
Being transported in a driverless car to me is like dining with pre-chewed food. Alan Weiss |
|||||||||||||
 |
||||||||||||||
