The Pain of the Dentist

The Pain of the Dentist

I visit every four months. I haven’t had a cavity in ten years, my gums are in good shape, and thanks to the wonders of cosmetic dentistry, I have very straight, white teeth, which my parents couldn’t afford to provide way back when.

Yet, there apparently is no business input into dental office management or experiences.

 

• The receptionist doesn’t greet you kindly, simply says, “Okay, take a seat.”
• The appointment starts slightly late, no one apologizes or acknowledges it.
• There is no music in the room.
• The hygienist berates you about your dental regimen. In fact, I’ve never met a hygienist who wasn’t a zealot. They are unhappy with you if you’re not devoting 90 percent of your waking hours to examining your teeth, cleaning your teeth, and then thinking about your teeth.
• You don’t get to see the dentist. It’s the cleaning and that’s that. You feel like a horse, really.
• Speaking of which, in a high tech age, the hygienist noisily and manually scrapes gunk off of teeth with a primitive metal instrument.
• Most hygienists choose to use your chest as a work bench, and place their primitive instruments there.
• Your mouth is never irrigated properly, so you swallow some gunk or feel like you’re being water-boarded.
• The receptionist never has change. How can a business that can be paid in cash not have change? She makes no apologies. Of course, by forcing clients to make a credit card purchase, the dentist is encouraging about 3 percent in fees which are right of the bottom line. (She has a worn, white envelope that is empty—that’s their fiscal management system.)
• Many dentists advertise by showing their exam rooms, chairs, and instruments, when they should be showing their patients’ smiles and/or happy lives.
• The staff never gets the follow-up right for the next appointment.

Note: Dentists have the third highest rate of suicide among all professions according to Business Insider. It’s a wonder their patients don’t.