Your Legacy is Now
Life is not a search for meaning from others, it’s about the creation of meaning for yourself.
For over 30 years Alan Weiss has consulted, coached, and advised everyone from Fortune 500 executives, state governors, non-profit directors, and entrepreneurs to athletes, entertainers, and beauty pageant contestants. That’s quite an assortment of people, and they run into the thousands. Most of them have had what we euphemistically call “means,” and some of them have had a lot more than that. Others have been aspiring and with more ends in sight than means on hand.
Alan Weiss states:
I’ve dealt with esteem (low), narcissism (high), family problems, leadership dysfunctions, insecurities, addictions, and ethical quandaries. And I’ve talked about them through the coronavirus crisis. But don’t get the wrong idea. About 95% of these people have been well-meaning, honest (to the best of their knowledge), and interested in becoming a better person and better professional. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be talking to me.
I found the equivalent of the “runner’s wall” in their journeys, where they must break through the pain and the obstacles and then can keep going with renewed energy and spirit. But runners know how far they must go after the breakthrough, be it another half lap or another five miles. There is a finish line.
I’ve found that people in all positions, even after the “breakthrough,” don’t know where they are in the race, let alone where the finish line is.
They do not know what meaning is for them. They may have money in the bank, good relationships, the admiration of others, and the love of their dogs. But they have no metrics for “What now?” They believe that at the end of life there is a tallying, some metaphysical accountant who totals up their contributions, deducts their bad acts, and creates the (hopefully positive) difference.
That difference, they believe, is their “legacy.”
But the thought that legacy arrives at the end of life is as ridiculous as someone who decides to sell a business and tries to increase its valuation the day prior. Legacy is now. Legacy is daily. Every day we create the next page in our lives, but the question becomes who is writing it and what’s being written. Is someone else creating our legacy? Or are we, ourselves, simply writing the same page repeatedly?
Or do we leave it blank?
Our organic, living legacy is marred and squeezed by huge normative pressures. There is a “threshold” point, at which one’s beliefs and values are overridden by immense peer pressure. Our metrics are forced to change.
In an age of social media, biased press, and bullying, we’ve come to a point where our legacy, ironically, is almost out of our hands.
Yet our “meaning”—our creation of meaning and not a search for some illusive alchemy—creates worth and impact for us and all those with whom we interact.
Eric May
Thanks for that, Alan. I just wanted to ask your readers if their business cards are still a useful (albiet modest) “leave-behind” or are they superfluous in the smartphone/iPad era? Thanks for your comments. Eric
Steve Reznikoff
I prefer an electronic business card. It’s easier to get into my Microsoft CRM contact management system. I like the iPhone bump app or attaching a vcard to an email.
Second choice is paper.
michael cardus
Business cards are useful for sharing how people can get a hold of you.
If you generate interest in your work, brand, self people with your card can find your website, call you and you can do the same.
I don’t think they are obsolete.
YET, I still find people in networking events that lead with their card and are insulted when I do not share mine. I usually don’t share my card because I know nothing about them, their business etc.. and sharing my card is a waste of both of our time.
Paul Evans
Even though I do not use business cards, I am amazed at the number of people who ask for one. Maybe it’s conditioning. Or maybe there are still those who actually follow-up because of a card. However, rarely have these people been buyers. 🙂
Alan Weiss
I personally loathe people who keep shoving cards at me, which I politely put in a pocket until I can throw them out, out of sight. If I don’t know you or your work and have expressed no interest in it, why on earth would I keep your card? And those who say, “Please refer me to people who need this,” are just loopy. How do I know you’re not an axe murderer?
Ian Brodie
I wonder if I got a card printed up with a job title of Axe Murderer whether anyone would notice?
Alan Weiss
Many people ask for a card to feign interest and get rid of you.
Jack Lovell
Do so when valid (i.e. give when asked and ask when interested in further contact).
Bump is not ideal – Checking if the other person has it and then getting out phones and bumping, while OK in some instances, is a distraction in most cases.
I don’t want to rely on my memory to remember an email address. I also don’t want to take time right then to write or type it or a phone number.
So yes, useful with basic info – name, email and phone (no website assuming the domain in your email address is your website). Follow up emails with vCards each way is the polite thing to do – I certainly don’t want to actually type in all the details or even take the time to use a biz card reader.
Dave Gardner
Business cards are not obsolete. While I don’t push them at people, when there’s a mutual interest in having each other’s contact information, I provide my business card and accept one in return.
Alan Weiss
I love the juvenile cuteness: “Chief Delight the Customer Officer.” “Head of Innovative Breaking the Box.” Please.