Your Legacy is Now
Life is not a search for meaning from others, it’s about the creation of meaning for yourself.
For over 30 years Alan Weiss has consulted, coached, and advised everyone from Fortune 500 executives, state governors, non-profit directors, and entrepreneurs to athletes, entertainers, and beauty pageant contestants. That’s quite an assortment of people, and they run into the thousands. Most of them have had what we euphemistically call “means,” and some of them have had a lot more than that. Others have been aspiring and with more ends in sight than means on hand.
Alan Weiss states:
I’ve dealt with esteem (low), narcissism (high), family problems, leadership dysfunctions, insecurities, addictions, and ethical quandaries. And I’ve talked about them through the coronavirus crisis. But don’t get the wrong idea. About 95% of these people have been well-meaning, honest (to the best of their knowledge), and interested in becoming a better person and better professional. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be talking to me.
I found the equivalent of the “runner’s wall” in their journeys, where they must break through the pain and the obstacles and then can keep going with renewed energy and spirit. But runners know how far they must go after the breakthrough, be it another half lap or another five miles. There is a finish line.
I’ve found that people in all positions, even after the “breakthrough,” don’t know where they are in the race, let alone where the finish line is.
They do not know what meaning is for them. They may have money in the bank, good relationships, the admiration of others, and the love of their dogs. But they have no metrics for “What now?” They believe that at the end of life there is a tallying, some metaphysical accountant who totals up their contributions, deducts their bad acts, and creates the (hopefully positive) difference.
That difference, they believe, is their “legacy.”
But the thought that legacy arrives at the end of life is as ridiculous as someone who decides to sell a business and tries to increase its valuation the day prior. Legacy is now. Legacy is daily. Every day we create the next page in our lives, but the question becomes who is writing it and what’s being written. Is someone else creating our legacy? Or are we, ourselves, simply writing the same page repeatedly?
Or do we leave it blank?
Our organic, living legacy is marred and squeezed by huge normative pressures. There is a “threshold” point, at which one’s beliefs and values are overridden by immense peer pressure. Our metrics are forced to change.
In an age of social media, biased press, and bullying, we’ve come to a point where our legacy, ironically, is almost out of our hands.
Yet our “meaning”—our creation of meaning and not a search for some illusive alchemy—creates worth and impact for us and all those with whom we interact.
Squirrel
What motivates you to write to the CEOs Alan? I just had terrible service from Harrod’s, who seemed to be bent on making it as hard as possible for me to give them my money. But I wasn’t planning to write to the Prime Minister of Qatar, I was just going to switch back to Fortnum and Mason. Am I missing something?
Alan Weiss
If I didn’t know you I’d think you were being snide. Who’s the General Manager of Harrod’s? Easy to find out, easy enough to write to. Use some reason. The larger issue is that I write to the tip person who can effect fast change. When I had trouble with Bentley, I wrote to the Bentley CEO, not the VW CEO, even though VW owns Bentley.
Squirrel
Certainly no intent to be snide, apologies! I understand clearly why you’d go to the most powerful person on the scene to get a current change made or an immediate problem ameliorated. But in many cases I’m just disappointed with a poor result that can’t really be fixed (Harrod’s can’t give me back the hour I spent re-ordering from their web site – failure work!), and I find it easier to switch to a competitor rather than try to help improve the service for next time via the CEO. Perhaps you are just more hopeful than I am!
Alan Weiss
You’re right about that. If I believe in a company (or I have no choice with a monopoly, like the gas company) I try to give them a chance by going to the top with my complaint. But if that’s not handled well, I’ll go elsewhere if it’s not making the situation still worse for me. I can change my lawn care people with impunity, but I’m not about to change my doctor even though the office staff is inefficient.
Squirrel
Aha, that’s the distinction then. Harrod’s and Fortnum’s are interchangeable (for me), but I have invested in complaints to my GP because I like my doctor. Thanks!
Alan Weiss
It’s an investment and ROI decision. I only have one local mayor I can complain to, or I can move to another city. How bad is the problem?