Your Legacy is Now
Life is not a search for meaning from others, it’s about the creation of meaning for yourself.
For over 30 years Alan Weiss has consulted, coached, and advised everyone from Fortune 500 executives, state governors, non-profit directors, and entrepreneurs to athletes, entertainers, and beauty pageant contestants. That’s quite an assortment of people, and they run into the thousands. Most of them have had what we euphemistically call “means,” and some of them have had a lot more than that. Others have been aspiring and with more ends in sight than means on hand.
Alan Weiss states:
I’ve dealt with esteem (low), narcissism (high), family problems, leadership dysfunctions, insecurities, addictions, and ethical quandaries. And I’ve talked about them through the coronavirus crisis. But don’t get the wrong idea. About 95% of these people have been well-meaning, honest (to the best of their knowledge), and interested in becoming a better person and better professional. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be talking to me.
I found the equivalent of the “runner’s wall” in their journeys, where they must break through the pain and the obstacles and then can keep going with renewed energy and spirit. But runners know how far they must go after the breakthrough, be it another half lap or another five miles. There is a finish line.
I’ve found that people in all positions, even after the “breakthrough,” don’t know where they are in the race, let alone where the finish line is.
They do not know what meaning is for them. They may have money in the bank, good relationships, the admiration of others, and the love of their dogs. But they have no metrics for “What now?” They believe that at the end of life there is a tallying, some metaphysical accountant who totals up their contributions, deducts their bad acts, and creates the (hopefully positive) difference.
That difference, they believe, is their “legacy.”
But the thought that legacy arrives at the end of life is as ridiculous as someone who decides to sell a business and tries to increase its valuation the day prior. Legacy is now. Legacy is daily. Every day we create the next page in our lives, but the question becomes who is writing it and what’s being written. Is someone else creating our legacy? Or are we, ourselves, simply writing the same page repeatedly?
Or do we leave it blank?
Our organic, living legacy is marred and squeezed by huge normative pressures. There is a “threshold” point, at which one’s beliefs and values are overridden by immense peer pressure. Our metrics are forced to change.
In an age of social media, biased press, and bullying, we’ve come to a point where our legacy, ironically, is almost out of our hands.
Yet our “meaning”—our creation of meaning and not a search for some illusive alchemy—creates worth and impact for us and all those with whom we interact.
Matt
Can’t find you on there Alan. Can you blog you public LinkedIn url so people can connect with you?
Matt
Alan Weiss
You need to look harder. Two dozen people have just joined or linked, or whatever the heck it is. Of course, you’re not a social media guru, as I am. (My home page just says “linkedin.com,” so that won’t be too helpful. Can someone assist Matt?)
Avonelle Lovhaug
Matt – try: http://www.linkedin.com/pub/9/748/272
Apparently when you do a search on LinkedIn for a person, it initially filters the list to people within your network. So unless Alan was connected to someone else in your network, you wouldn’t see him. You have to select the “LinkedIn Network” tab instead of the “Your Network” tab. (At least that worked for me.)
Matt
Don’t worry I actually managed to find you straight after I wrote the comment and you’ve accepted the connection. It was the network filtering thing that threw me. Thanks to Avonelle for posting the public url
Matt
Peter Bodifee
Alan,
Just be prepared that some odd people are going to approach you this way as they want to “exploit” your network. Just ignore it like you do with spam.
I believe that LinkedIn should be used to connect with people you really know. So all my blog readers (and anyone else as well) get only a connection request granted if I really know them.
There are these super-networkers on LinkedIn, people who publicly solicit connections from everybody. I have connections with 2 of those, both are in an industry that somewhat reflect my clients/prospects (IT and multi-cultural organisations). The effect is that all their connection (sometimes 15000+) become now second degree contacts and their connections 3rd degree. So the LinkedIn “cloud” becomes quite large (mine is 4.3 million+) while I have “only” 288 1st degree connections). Quite some of the LinkedIn functionality is limited to your network. In my case I have quite a large group, but they are not some odd people I have no desire for.
The fun part is that it allows you to get in touch with friends you lost contact with. All I do is browse the connections of my 1st degree connections and you will be amazed how quickly you find them. Enjoy!
Peter
P.S. Your profile will become 100% complete if you have 3 or more recommendations 🙂
Alan Weiss
Here’s an irony: When I clicked on the link in your email to accept your invitation, Safari found a page that “could not be opened.” That’s happened three times just today. I’m finding Linkedin to be the Studebaker of sports cars. It may be slower, but it also doesn’t look very good.
Can you do something else to “link” to me?! (Like sending a courier!)
Okay, who’s going to recommend me out there?! I crave completeness……
Avonelle Lovhaug
It sounds like LinkedIn is fairly Safari unfriendly. That’s too bad. (I’ve had very few problems with LinkedIn, but I almost always access it via Windows/IE. Lame, I know.)
One of the things I find frustrating about LinkedIn are some of the limitations placed on connections. On the one hand, I agree I don’t want to connect with just anyone. On the other hand, I’ve often struggled with finding the right “connection type” to use when sending an invitation. For example, I wanted to connect to my cousin, who I’ve never worked with but who is in a related industry. There never seemed to be the right type. She isn’t my friend. She isn’t a colleague. But I do know her.
Similarly, I struggled with connecting to people in my local chamber of commerce. I had met them (so we weren’t strangers), but we had never done business together. Using “Other” just seemed wrong, somehow. Eventually, my chamber created a LinkedIn group, and now I can just use that.
Peter Bodifee
As you write in your books, ask for a recommendation 🙂 Yes, this feature is somewhat hidden in the LinkedIn user interface. It is like a Ferrari, if you haven’t been to Ferrari school, your experience with the car won’t last long 🙂
This rather straight forward link will bring you to the page to ask your connections for a recommendation: http://www.linkedin.com/references
Off course someone out of the blue can recommend you too. You have control over which recommendations you want to be visible (in case someone isn’t so nice to you). But there is no way you can alter the recommendation, only the endorser can do this.
Alan Weiss
I drove three Ferraris with no schooling at all. I’ve never taken one of my seven high performance cars onto a track. Still here!
Peter Bodifee
My analogy with the Ferrari was to illustrate that you won’t be able to take advantage of the full capabilities of powerful software without understanding the fundamentals AND the appropriate training.
Alan understands the fundamentals of networking perfectly (I assume), he may need some practicing using tools like LinkedIn, Plaxo, etc. And practicing without some guidance could lead to “deadly” results in cyber space. Just like taking a Ferrari on the Nurnbergring with only normal street driving experience observing speed limits.
The connection type in LinkedIn is only used as an attribute in the message of the connection request. So the receiving party gets more clues then just a name. Since there are no other ways known to me to take advantage of the connection type in an established connection, I believe that it is not stored in the LinkedIn database (but I could be wrong). Unlike Plaxo where you can create different networks for family, real friends and business using the connection type. LinkedIn is a pure professional network so the distinction seems not to be relevant. Certain connection types do require the knowledge of the email address of the other person.
The LinkedIn problems yesterday and today triggered me in realizing that LinkedIn is trying to introduce targeted advertising. Knowing that this kind of software change is like replacing the engine in a car with a different one, it is no surprise that the car is now of the track. I hope for the mechanics that they learn quickly, you don’t want to keep 20 million+ drivers waiting to long 😉
Alan Weiss
Here are my early impressions, though they may well be premature: Linkedin is overwhelmingly about finding a job. The technology, to me, is astonishingly non-user friendly, and the aesthetics are woeful. I can see the potential, but the advisory that I now have “650,000 connections” is really funny. More to come as I fool around. — The Master of Social Media
Peter Bodifee
If someone tries to find a job using LinkedIn: good luck. LinkedIn is extensively used by recruiters to find people for jobs. But LinkedIn is also used as a tool by some business developers to find buyers and recommenders. Their success is independent of LinkedIn features.
Many users are not yet exploiting the potential of the social networking tools like LinkedIn, Plaxo, etc. I would love to hear from a recognized expert (you) how much humans trust technology to help them on business communication. I get a lot of concerns on security and privacy. And misuse by “spammers”.
Alan Weiss
Your question is unclear to me. If there isn’t a qualitative analysis, then humans trust technology a lot, as in using the telephone (assuming you’re not paranoid). If there is a qualitative element (e.g., searching the web for automated patent advice instead of using an attorney), then I’d say you were just crazy.
Peter Bodifee
Telephone is also technology, but over a century old. Those who are afraid that their conversation is monitored have a point, but I have nothing to hide. I was more referring to more recent inventions in software. To be more specific the technology that is used for web2.0 applications: social networking software is just one of them.
I agree with you that searching for advise from an automated system is only for morons. Only humans can provide advise.
Wayne Botha
Inspired by the discussion on this blog I invested the time to update my profile on Linkedin. I ignored Linkedin for a few years because I did not understand the value it could bring me.
The good news is that I connected with colleagues I had not thought about since I left South Africa in 2001 when I moved to the USA. This connection invoked a couple of “How are you doing” emails from old friends.
On the down side it took eight hours to update my profile, search for colleagues and friends and invite each one to join me. The numerous frustations when Linkedin was not available did not improve matters.
Now that I am connected, what happens next? I am still not convinced that I will derive any benefit from these connections.
Mike Sivertsen
Alan,
I’ve been absorbing and recommending to others your email newsletters and blog since I attended your Dallas seminar sponsored by IMC in April 2003. The rose bush you so thoughtfully provided attendees still thrives in my North Texas backyard and is a pleasant reminder of your high caliber seminar.
It has been a rocking ride following your debate with the Web 2.0 adherents. I recently called myself a “millennial trapped in a Baby Boomers body” – so I can see this from both perspectives based on professional and personal experiences. I joined LinkedIn ( http://www.linkedin.com/pub/1/134/87 ) on the recommendation of a knowledge management professional in mid-2005. Many have noted that it provides a way for you to position positive content about yourself in search engine listings if you haven’t written extensively or have your own web site. Since many business partners, HR departments and the like may do an online search before engaging with you, LinkedIn is a way to make a good first impression. Having those you’ve worked with write recommendations can be helpful as well (like “blurbs” on a book cover). Of course a personal profile you build yourself is subjective but I include the same information I put on a resume for an employer and for which I am held accountable.
This advice from Seth Godin (who joined in the debate here earlier) is similar:
“Wherever we go, we leave electronic footprints. When you post a complaint on Epinions.com, a review on Amazon, or a comment in a newsgroup, your opinions are shared, with everyone, forever. Buy a house, default on a credit card, switch jobs a few times–it’s all there, online, for everyone to see. . .
“Spend your future creating your past, starting right now. Live your life out loud, well aware that everything you say can (and will) be used against you (or for you). Treat every customer as though he could turn into a testimonial. Treat every vendor as if she could give you a recommendation. And then, when the time comes, the seeds you’ve sown will pay off. Blogs, newsgroups, professional organizations, and all the rest are perfect for someone who wants to leave a vivid, positive trail. You can choose to use the new tools or to become a victim of them.”
from “You are your references”
http://www.fastcompany.com/node/47980/print
Alan Weiss
Sometimes your footprint is in the mud.
The problem with HR departments is that they search online for help, and the issue for consultants is that they need to be speaking to executives, not HR departments. See my newest post.
I don’t agree with your last paragraph at all. It sounds like a “Successories” poster. Be bold. The customer isn’t always right. Some vendors are not worth doing business with. Find solid relationships with superb people, and stop pretending that technology is important for its own sake. Most bloggers are leaving a “trail” of unintelligible dribble.
Peter Bodifee
The real question is: will the data in the social networking tools eventually be helpful in FINDING superb people. I think it will, it is just a matter of time before the databases will reach this critical mass.
The problem with the tooling is that the data format is proprietary. And the service providers usually don’t allow you to harvest the data other then going through their web site.
So those users not yet thrilled by the current opportunities are waiting which tool the eventually will use. This certainly slows the adoption rate of tools like LinkedIn and Plaxo to help you find people you want to do business with.
Alan Weiss
Who is validating what’s on there is real? How do you know you’re not dealing with a really smart dog?
Peter Bodifee
Good question as identity as it is implemented on most web based services is broken. I recommend reading “The Laws of Identity” by Kim Cameron.
On the other hand, LinkedIn is just a tool to help searching. One still has to validate using trusted real relationships.