Your Legacy is Now
Life is not a search for meaning from others, it’s about the creation of meaning for yourself.
For over 30 years Alan Weiss has consulted, coached, and advised everyone from Fortune 500 executives, state governors, non-profit directors, and entrepreneurs to athletes, entertainers, and beauty pageant contestants. That’s quite an assortment of people, and they run into the thousands. Most of them have had what we euphemistically call “means,” and some of them have had a lot more than that. Others have been aspiring and with more ends in sight than means on hand.
Alan Weiss states:
I’ve dealt with esteem (low), narcissism (high), family problems, leadership dysfunctions, insecurities, addictions, and ethical quandaries. And I’ve talked about them through the coronavirus crisis. But don’t get the wrong idea. About 95% of these people have been well-meaning, honest (to the best of their knowledge), and interested in becoming a better person and better professional. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be talking to me.
I found the equivalent of the “runner’s wall” in their journeys, where they must break through the pain and the obstacles and then can keep going with renewed energy and spirit. But runners know how far they must go after the breakthrough, be it another half lap or another five miles. There is a finish line.
I’ve found that people in all positions, even after the “breakthrough,” don’t know where they are in the race, let alone where the finish line is.
They do not know what meaning is for them. They may have money in the bank, good relationships, the admiration of others, and the love of their dogs. But they have no metrics for “What now?” They believe that at the end of life there is a tallying, some metaphysical accountant who totals up their contributions, deducts their bad acts, and creates the (hopefully positive) difference.
That difference, they believe, is their “legacy.”
But the thought that legacy arrives at the end of life is as ridiculous as someone who decides to sell a business and tries to increase its valuation the day prior. Legacy is now. Legacy is daily. Every day we create the next page in our lives, but the question becomes who is writing it and what’s being written. Is someone else creating our legacy? Or are we, ourselves, simply writing the same page repeatedly?
Or do we leave it blank?
Our organic, living legacy is marred and squeezed by huge normative pressures. There is a “threshold” point, at which one’s beliefs and values are overridden by immense peer pressure. Our metrics are forced to change.
In an age of social media, biased press, and bullying, we’ve come to a point where our legacy, ironically, is almost out of our hands.
Yet our “meaning”—our creation of meaning and not a search for some illusive alchemy—creates worth and impact for us and all those with whom we interact.
Duke Merhavy
I agree with your idea and concept (as I often do), but I had to comment about *how* you expressed it, Alan.
Yes we should be allowed to laugh at ourselves and the people we hold in high regard (though it is harder and harder to do with any politician). In contrast, we also have the right to find it ‘not funny’ or even in bad taste. But I found the comparison (“what much different”) to “Jihad”, to be completely off mark. It might be ignorance on your part on the meaning of the term, and that is why you made the statement.
Jihad is holy war… it is taking action to kill the infidels who do not believe in what one believes in. Plain and simple (unfortunately). Jihad is very different than saying “I don’t like the book because it offends me or what I believe in”. Expressing an opinion or feelings is very different than taking an action that substantially cause damage, especially a violent one. Kind of like the difference between a peaceful protest, and looting-rioting-hurting people.
The distinction is very important nowadays and I had to point it out.
Alan Weiss
It was a metaphor used to create importance. I certainly understand the difference, as does any reader, like yourself. Metaphors are used for exaggeration. When I way, “The layoff was like the meteor hitting the Yucatan and destroying the dominant animals,” no one is suggesting that a layoff and mass extinction are the same. I think you need to apply a bit more humor here. One of our problems today is the hyper-sensitivity to what is really free speech. I wasn’t equating jihad, I was using it as a radical comparison to make my point. You can point out whatever you like, I appreciate your reading my stuff.