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You Played Well, Though It Was Fortunate the Other Team Was Not Very Good

You Played Well, Though It Was Fortunate the Other Team Was Not Very Good

Passive aggressive behavior is the use of sarcasm, “innocent” comment, and undermining to attack someone else. One of my favorite descriptions (not my creation) is “weaponized kindness.”

This occurs when one person says, “My child was just accepted into the University of XYZ,” and the passive aggressive person replies, “Congratulations, I assume that was the back-up choice?”

I feel this is a personality disorder and it originates with terribly insecure people who disdain direct confrontation but choose to “ambush” others with faint praise. “That was a very good test result, even if it wasn’t as good as your sister’s.” Or “For someone your age…..”

You deal (or maybe I deal) with such behavior by confronting it: “Why would you say or imply something so hurtful? Are you having a bad day or do you resent others’ success?”

I call that “healthy confrontation.” At least it improves my health!

Written by

Alan Weiss is a consultant, speaker, and author of over 60 books. His consulting firm, Summit Consulting Group, Inc., has attracted clients from over 500 leading organizations around the world.

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